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Test of Faith? Surrender? or Both?

43 Days till leaving for Togo, West Africa

Approximately 4 days until plane tickets are to be purchased

Currently,  only 25% of my expenses have been raised 

This post is not about begging for money, because if I am to go on this mission trip, the Lord will provide (Phil 4:19). It’s about continuing in what God has called me to – Transparency – inviting you into my life … the struggles, the blessings … and the revelations that come along the way.

… So welcome to my trial. I’m living this trial out loud in front of you so you will all be along for the ride as His plans unfold and not mine.

Right now, I am feeling….Anxious…Stressed… Overwhelmed …  Was I supposed to do more to fund-raise? What else should I do? What if I don’t get to go? My mind is racing with all the things I have going on right now. Is my plate too full? Where is my peace? Am I working in my own strength? I’m already a part and contributing to the teams success, but am I supposed to physically go?

Thoughts -> Feelings -> Attitudes & Actions… 

What’s really going on here?

Is it a test of Faith??? Does God want to see if I trust him to provide in the final moments… to prove to me that it’s all Him and no one else? He has come through and provided so many times in my life when money has been a factor. I do rest in that… but sometimes my flesh makes me waver. HEAVENLY FATHER, I CHOOSE TO TRUST YOU!

Is it a test of Surrender??? Am I willing and OK not to go if this is what God wants? His ways are higher…Is there something else I am to be doing and I just can’t see the bigger picture? My plan is to go on this mission trip, not only to minister to the missionary’s wives, but also to the young ladies on my team. HEAVENLY FATHER, I WHOLLY AND COMPLETELY SURRENDER MY PLANS TO YOUR PERFECT ONE!

Thank you for listening to my trial… praying for His will and 

donating IF He leads you to. 

Let me know if you have any questions (

I will update you on His plan.


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